A CONFESSION TO MAKE


Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric anxiety disorder most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive, distressing, intrusive thoughts and related compulsions (tasks or "rituals") which attempt to neutralize the obsessions.


Symptoms may include some, all, or perhaps none of the following:

Repeated hand washing.

Repeated clearing of the throat, although nothing may need to be cleared.

Specific counting systems — e.g., counting in groups of four, arranging objects in groups of three, grouping objects in odd/even numbered groups, etc.

One serious symptom which stems from this is "counting" steps — e.g., feeling the necessity to take 12 steps to the car in the morning. YES

Perfectly aligning objects at complete, absolute right angles, or aligning objects perfectly parallel etc. This symptom is shared with OCPD and can be confused with this condition unless it is realized that in OCPD it is not stress-related. YES


Fear of acting out on violent or aggressive impulses, or feeling overly responsible for the safety of others. YES


Sexual obsessions or unwanted sexual thoughts. Two classic examples are fear of being homosexual or fear of being a pedophile. In both cases, sufferers will obsess over whether or not they are genuinely aroused by the thoughts.


Strange and chronic worries about certain events such as sleeping, eating, leaving home, etc without proper items. An example would be one who literally can't fall asleep without a metronome. YES

Having to "cancel out" bad thoughts with good thoughts. An example of this would be imagining harming a child and having to imagine a child playing happily to cancel it out. YES


A fear of contamination (see Mysophobia); some sufferers may fear the presence of human body secretions such as saliva, blood, sweat, tears, vomit, or mucus, or excretions such as urine or feces. Some OCD sufferers even fear that the soap they're using is contaminated.


A need for both sides of the body to feel even. A person with OCD might walk down a sidewalk and step on a crack with the ball of their left foot, then feel the need to step on another crack with the ball of their right foot. If one hand gets wet, the sufferer may feel very uncomfortable if the other is not. If the sufferer is walking and bumps into something, he/she may hit the object or person back to feel a sense of evenness. These symptoms are also experienced in a reversed manner. Some sufferers would rather things to be uneven, favoring the preferred side of the body. YES


An obsession with numbers (be it in math class, watching TV, or in a room). Some people are obsessed with even numbers and loathe odd numbers (odd numbers cause them a great deal of anxiety and often make the person uncomfortable or even angry) or vice versa. YES

Fear of transformation. A fear of transforming into someone or something else. Losing ones self or taking on undesired characteristics is what creates the anxiety and fear. Rituals such as counting, blinking, checking, hand washing etc. may eliminate the anxiety when they are done in a way which "feels right" to the sufferer. YES

In some cases, a pattern of uniformity on a bank account may indicate obsessive-compulsive spending. For example, an OCD-affected figure skater may issue a check to his/her coach for a private lesson every week, paying the same amount each time. In addition, the affected person may feel complacent about or invincible against the economic issues.

Celebrities with OCD
Cameron Diaz
Jessica Alba
Billy Bob Thornton
David Beckham
Alec Baldwin
Jennifer Love Hewitt
Leonardo Dicaprio
Paul Gascoigne
Jane Horrocks
Natalie Appleton
Fred Durst (Limp Bizkit)
Woody Allen

http://www.ivillage.co.uk/newspol/celeb/cfeat/articles/0,,528719_685869-2,00.html

Personal Comments: I had OCD since i was a child, and i thought that i must be crazy or smth, so i didnt dare to tell anybody, until 2 years ago i met my friend Sheron who has been seeing a psychiatrist. I guess her OCD was worse because it made her so depressed that she even skipped school, but she is a very smart young lady and we clicked very well, i guess it is because we both understand how it feels to have this condition.

When i was young, battling OCD was tough. I remembered how i would blow bubbles in the shower so that i would not have asthma, i despised the colour red because it is the colour of blood, i despised odd numbers, i would avoid stepping on the drains on the pavement and many more.. until one point of time i tell myself that this has got to stop, and it was very very difficult to get over them.

Now, i still have some symptoms that i need to overcome. For one, i keep thinking that if i think that tommorow is gonna be a great day, that's when it will suck.

I fear disappointments..so much so that i doubt my boyfriend and sometimes accused him of cheating. I have so much anxiety that sometimes i would really kick up a big fuss.

Sometimes mirrors freak me out.

I despise people breathing on me because i feel that they will pass their bad luck to me, i think some of close friends noticed about this.

And then sometimes my brain will tell me to walk the other way, if not something will happen to my father, and then i'll be so scared that i am compelled to do it.

People with OCD usually have a high level of imagination, as Jessica alba says, it is part of being creative. That is why they think so much and it causes so much anxiety for themselves, i am not a freak, i just need therapy, i need love and support from friends.. I never told any of my friends and my family about this... and this post is just to let it out..